Kubla Christie Gets His Glass Slippers

I've been struggling with the urge to blog again about Xanadu, my favorite hot topic. I'm finding it harder to start any post about this subject because it requires such a long explanation for anyone not familiar with it. If you need some background to get caught up to speed start here and here.

I've been struggling with the urge to write something but once again I've found myself without any meaningful content to share because I haven't done any work on my new painting since last week. I've been following the Xanadu story in the news, but lately there's not been anything worth sharing. Last night I realized that there's a deeper meaning in this quagmire.

I'm going to do something terribly irresponsible here. I'm going to offer some wild speculation about Xanadu and New Jersey Governor Chris "Kubla" Christie, but since I'm not a real journalist, I can get away with such foolishness. Actually, since I'm an artist I can just claim to be using artistic license and say pretty much whatever I like.

Here it is: Chris Christie is going to run for president in 2012, and he added Triple Five to the list of New Jersey's corporate welfare recipients because they're going to give him a hefty sum of cash to help him achieve that goal. Triple Five, in case you don't know, is the owner of such shoppatainment orgy-plexes as the Mall of America. They now own the mess once known as Xanadu in the New Jersey Meadowlands, which they have re-named American Dream. Didn't they get the memo that the Meadowlands are where dreams go to die? Just ask Matt Dodge.

It never occurred to me before because until I read this article by Leslie Savon from The Nation I didn't know the Republicans were even remotely interested in Christie running in 2012. And now I get it. There's not a whole lot for Red State Republican voters to dislike about Christie. His recent missteps and slipping job approval are not widely known outside of New Jersey and the surrounding region. In fact, he's relatively unknown across the country aside from some anecdotes about what a great reformer he is. It has the makings of a good Cindarella story.

But locals know better. Here's an example of love for Kubla Christie, from a happy New Jerseyan who commented on a recent article on NorthJersey.com:

Sunday May 15, 2011, 6:05 AM - Resident8 says:
Is there any grants from the government that can help Christie make the blasted pension payments? Oh I forgot, public workers are middle class and that's not in Christie's best interest. Fat pile of garbage, I hope he chokes to death on his triple chin...

I think Resident8 cuts right to the heart of the matter and articulates his point rather eloquently. I know I've been unfair to Christie about this whole Xanadu thing. The state got into this mess under Jim McGreevey. But his decision to give handouts to Triple Five fits in nicely with his overall agenda of slashing and burning public education (he's a school voucher advocate) and jobs and services that are desperately needed while greasing the palms of millionaires to help facilitate his political ambitions.

Christie's blunders and transgressions won't be heard of beyond the Mid-Atlantic states for several years. It doesn't matter that he's not well-like here because he won't win New Jersey or any nearby state, so who cares what he does at home. Plus he's betting the house on Xanadu. If it succeeds, he wins. If it doesn't, the people that hate him the most will vote for a Democrat, which they would have anyway.

The rumors surrounding the maligned exterior of the complex seem to be pointing to the idea of improving the look by changing the multicolored metal skin with glass. They should keep some glass aside so Christie can make himself a pair of shoes to wear to the Ball.